That in thy stead he might have ministered unto me - As Philemon was one of Paul's converts, he became thereby his spiritual father, and had a right to his services when in need. This was a strong argument, not only to induce Philemon to forgive his servant, but to send him back to the apostle, that he might minister to him in his master's stead.
Whom I would have retained with me, that in thy stead - “That he might render me the service which I know you would if you were here.” The Greek is: “for thee” ὑπὲρ σοῦ huper southat is, what he should do for Paul might be regarded as done by Philemon himself. He might have ministered unto me - He might have rendered me assistance ( διακονῇ diakonē); to wit, in such a way as one who was in bonds would need.